


Dickens the Lion

by Drumchik



Category: Warehouse 13
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 05:17:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5526830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drumchik/pseuds/Drumchik
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A gift for magicmumu for the Bering and Wells Christmas Gift Exchange.</p>
<p>Claudia and Helena accidentally turn Dickens into a lion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dickens the Lion

**Author's Note:**

  * For [magicmumu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicmumu/gifts).



Myka was exhausted as she made her way upstairs to the room she shared with Helena at the B and B. It had been a long week chasing a guy who was doing a great impersonation of The Flash, zigzagging with Pete across the country. All she wanted was to fall face first into her bed and sleep for a month.

It would appear, however, life had other plans.

Her first clue that something was amiss was when she found Claudia lurking at her door. The redhead had her ear to the door, and when she saw Myka, she jumped away guiltily.

“Hey, Myka! How was your trip? Did you catch The Flash? Let’s go get something to eat and you can tell me all about it!”

The loud cry of her name and Claudia’s exuberance to go and chat was her second clue.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing!” came the high-pitched reply.

Despite Claudia’s frantic pleas, Myka pushed the girl aside and opened the door.

The first thing she saw, on her bed, was a lion, curled up and chuffing. The second thing she saw was her wife, who had apparently sprouted elf ears.

As Helena opened her mouth, Myka shut the door again. She blinked and turned to Claudia, who was trying to shrink into the wall.

“Why is there a lion in my bedroom? And why does my wife have elf ears?”

“I can explain,” Claudia assured her. “See, HG thought Dickens would like some catnip and I couldn’t find any but I remembered a catnip toy in the Christmas aisle and…”

Myka put up her hand. She opened the door and, catching Helena’s eyes, pointed to the lion and mouthed, “Dickens?”

Helena nodded. Myka sighed and closed the door.

“Okay, why the elf ears?”

Claudia shrugged. “Christmas aisle?”

Myka ran her hand over her face. “And the reason Helena is in there with the main-eating lion?”

“It’s still Dickens. He hasn’t threatened her. But we can’t get the catnip toy away from him to neutralise it. Also, HG doesn’t want him to get out, or Pete to see the elf ears.”

Myka sighed again, opened the door and went in. She rested her back against the door. “I really wish people would read the manual.”

“Yes, dear, I’ve often wished people had your studious nature.”

“Nice ears.”

“Thank you. Nice trip?”

“Same old, same old. So, Christmas catnip, huh?”

“It would appear so, yes. Claudia overestimated my need for it, it would seem.” Helena gestured to her ears. “We’ve had discussions over this.”

“I can imagine.”

Helena glanced at her wife. “No, darling, you really can’t. And when we can retrieve that infernal toy, we shall never speak of this again.”

Dickens the lion yawned and rolled over on the bed.

“I’m just glad we have such a sturdy bed,” Myka commented.

“As am I. For so many reasons.”

“So, plan of attack?”

“He’s currently got the toy in his paws. I have been waiting for the opportune moment to grab it and neutralise it.”

Myka rolled up her sleeves. “Right. He doesn’t seem to want to eat us.”

“Yes. I assume it is just Dickens, but in lion form.”

“Okay. Uh, Dickens?”

The lion looked up at his name. They got a glimpse of the cat toy in his giant paws. But when Myka approached to take it, Dickens made a low growling sound which echoed through the inn.

“Guys, don’t let him eat you!” came Claudia’s concerned voice.

“Yes, thank you for that advice,” Helena replied. She turned to Myka. “Thus has been my afternoon.”

“Well, the way I see it, we have two options. Option one, we wait until he gets sick of the dog. I’m vetoing that option because I’m tired and I want to cuddle with my wife.”

“And option two?”

Myka smiled. “We have the person who wanted to adopt the cat and who thought it would be a good idea to use an artefact to fix the problem.”

The last part was said loud enough so that Claudia could hear and the girl opened the door and peered around, looking fearful. “I’m not going to like this, am I?”

\--

Later that evening, Myka and Helena cuddled by the fire. Claudia was doing laundry, getting the last of the neutraliser goo out of Myka and Helena’s room. Dickens, who had been covered in neutraliser and then subsequently bathed by Claudia, now sat in front of the fire, hissing at anyway who came near him.

Myka ran her fingers over Helena’s earlobes, which were thankfully back to normal.

“So, explain this to me. You, who had to be conned into keeping the cat, all of a sudden decided you wanted to give him catnip?”

“Why, Myka, I don’t know whatever you mean.”

“Please tell me you didn’t just want to find out what it would be like to have a lion around the house.”

There was a short silence before Helena spoke.

“Myka, do you remember a few years ago when we promised not to lie to each other?”

“Of course.”

Helena got up and smiled, extending her hand to her wife. “I’m glad you remember that. Which is why I respectfully will not answer that question. Shall we go to bed?”

FINIS


End file.
